I ate a slice of cake on Saturday. The really cheap but amazing yellow spongy kind you get in a box at the supermarket and top with cheap chocolate frosting from the same aisle. It was my friend’s birthday and for numerous reasons I won’t expand upon here, I felt the need to indulge. I wanted to cheat on my diet and I wanted to cheat big. So then on Sunday I ate another piece. Ah, leftovers.
Today is Monday and I’m in a bad way. Massive headache all day. Some spasming in my left leg. Poor balance. And a general feeling of dis-ease. And I’m thrilled about it! I mean don’t get me wrong, I hate it. I hate that two pieces of cake in two days turns me into an MS cliche. But I love it, because the cause and effect chain is so apparent, so obvious, so awesomely not a scientific double-blind study sanctioned by doctors, and yet so wonderfully and simply true. Sugar and gluten equals symptoms. Abstaining from sugar and gluten equals no symptoms. I love the confidence with which I can assert that this is true for me, because I’ve tested the theory again and again and again and the outcome is always the same. I love that I know my body better than anyone, even a highly-trained neurologist. I may not understand all the scientific hoo-ha that he does, but I know what makes my body feel good and what makes it feel bad. Of course diet isn’t the only factor in keeping symptoms at bay, that would be way too simple for a disease like MS that loves to be complex. But it’s a huge part of the equation.
The Upside of Cheating
There’s a beauty in cheating when you eat a diet this strict. Anyone that knows me will tell you that when I eat a piece of cake, it’s an experience. Not quite religious, almost sexual, definitely deviant. But the best part isn’t that. The best part is days like today, when I’m symptomatic, because they remind me how life could be if I were unwilling to be on the diet I am on, or if I simply didn’t know how effective it could be at keeping me healthy. I consider how I am after only two pieces of cake and I wonder how awful I’d be doing if I ate this way every day, and added in dairy, and wheat, and more sugar. The discomfort of a day like today is my motivation and my reward to continue on my path. To know that all I have to do is control the food that enters my system and I can have a significant impact on the way my illness manifests? That is incredible. That is power.
What are you doing to control the way your disease manifests? How are you taking control?
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I know exactly what you mean by knowing your body better than anyone else and I really enjoy your posts/blog. What you just described is exactly what I’m going through right now yet I am having a hard time cutting the last strings
I’ve been dairy free for months now and have improved a TON (but I know I can get even better), I’ve gone from having a very dificult time walking and not trusting myself to carry my kids to walking normal and carrying my twins at the same time again 
I’ve felt so good. Diet is everything along with a positive attitude.
Hi Bri! Thanks so much for taking the time to write. That’s awesome that you’re doing so much better as a result of your dietary changes! It seems so obvious – the connection between the food we eat and the way we feel, and yet so many people are suffering needlessly. I appreciate your feedback very much and it’s great that you can carry your twins again!
Warmly,
Karen
Karen, this blog puts into words what so many of us understand…..and what our neurologists don’t. (And, as usual, it is so perfectly stated in a way only you can do!)
At my last visit, my dr. again pushed copaxone (even though my symptoms are diminishing). I told her I was doing well with my diet, meditation, acupuncture and yoga. I told her that I knew at my very core that I was going to get better and also that my “intuition” told me that drugs would only compromise my healing. She asked me how I could be so sure? I think I might just show her this blog…..thanks for putting into words what so many of us feel.
Deb
hi deb. thank you so much for your note and your kind words. sounds like you are on a wonderful healing path. i think doctors can often become arrogant because they’re so highly educated, but they’re only educated in this one specific paradigm, and people like you have an incredible opportunity to open them up and educate them! i’m really glad you’re staying true to your intuition and letting your neurologist know what’s working for you. that’s amazing.